Coaching Skills for Managers: Using the GROW Model

Coaching skills are the skills a manager uses to help someone think a problem through and reach their own answer, rather than being told what to do. The core ones are listening properly, asking open questions, giving honest feedback and agreeing a clear next step. Most managers already use some of them; the GROW model gives those conversations a simple structure.

What coaching is, and what it isn't

The CIPD describes coaching as a non-directive form of development, focused on improving performance and developing the individual. Non-directive is the important bit. When you coach, the other person does most of the thinking and most of the talking. Your job is to help them see the problem clearly and commit to doing something about it.

It helps to separate three things managers do:

• Managing: you set the standard, give the instruction and check it's done. Right for rotas, policy, safety and anything urgent.
• Mentoring: a more experienced colleague shares what they know. The CIPD notes that mentoring relationships tend to run longer than coaching arrangements.
• Coaching: you ask, listen and challenge so the person finds their own way forward. Right when they have what they need to solve it but haven't stepped back to think.

The core coaching skills

Listening to understand

Most of us listen for a gap so we can offer the answer. Coaching listening is different: you're listening for what the person thinks, what's worrying them and what they haven't said. Let pauses run, and resist finishing their sentences.

Asking open questions

Open questions start with what, how, who or when. "What's getting in the way?" opens a conversation. "Have you tried talking to the night staff?" closes it, because it's your solution with a question mark on the end. A few that work in almost any situation:

• What would a good outcome look like?
• What have you tried so far, and what happened?
• What else could you do?
• What's the first step, and when will you take it?

Reflecting back and summarising

Playing back what you've heard ("So handover runs late because nights are still finishing the medication round?") shows you've listened and lets the person correct you.

Giving honest feedback

Coaching isn't all questions. Sometimes the most useful thing you can offer is what you've seen. Keep it specific and observable: what happened, when, and the effect it had. "On Tuesday handover took 40 minutes and two carers missed the start of breakfast" is something a person can work with. "You need to be more organised" isn't.

Holding people to the action

A coaching conversation that ends without a clear action is a nice chat. Agree what will happen, by when, and when you'll pick it up again. Then do pick it up.

The GROW model

GROW was developed in the UK in the late 1980s by Sir John Whitmore and colleagues, including Graham Alexander and Alan Fine, and became widely known through Whitmore's book Coaching for Performance, first published in 1992. Performance Consultants, the firm Whitmore founded, sets the letters out as Goals, Reality, Options and Will.

1. Goal: what does the person want from this conversation, and from the situation? "By the end of this, what would you like to have decided?"
2. Reality: what's actually happening now, with facts rather than impressions. "Talk me through the last three handovers."
3. Options: what could they do? Get several on the table before judging any of them. "If you had a free hand, what would you change?"
4. Will: what will they do, by when, and how committed are they? "Out of ten, how likely are you to do it? What would make it a ten?"

A GROW conversation in practice

Sam is a senior carer on days. Morning handovers keep overrunning and she's fed up with the night team. Her deputy manager could tell her how to fix it. Instead, they work through GROW:

• Goal: Sam wants handover finished by 8.15 so breakfast starts on time.
• Reality: talking it through, she realises handover only overruns on certain nights, and that the written notes are thin, so everything gets said out loud.
• Options: a one-page handover sheet, a five-minute huddle for the essentials, a quiet word with one night carer, asking the night senior to flag anything urgent first.
• Will: she'll draft the handover sheet by Friday, trial it for two weeks and bring it to her next supervision.

Sam owns the plan, so she's more likely to see it through. The deputy's job is to ask how it went.

When to coach and when to tell

Coaching isn't the right tool for everything. Tell, don't coach, when:

• someone is at risk, or there's a safeguarding concern
• a law, policy or care plan sets out what must happen
• the person is new and doesn't yet have the knowledge to draw on
• there's no time, such as a fall, a collapse or a short-staffed shift

Coach when the person has the knowledge but is stuck, when a problem keeps coming back, or when you want them to grow into a bigger role.

Using coaching in supervision

In England, Regulation 18 of the Health and Social Care Act 2008 (Regulated Activities) Regulations 2014 requires staff in CQC-registered services to receive appropriate support, training, professional development, supervision and appraisal. Parts of supervision aren't coaching: checking training is up to date, safeguarding, wellbeing, performance. The development part is where coaching earns its place.

A simple way to use it:

• Ask the person to bring one thing they want to work on.
• Use GROW for that item, and hold your own suggestions until they've run out of theirs.
• Write the agreed action into the supervision record in their words.
• Open the next supervision by asking how it went.

For more on running supervision well, see our supervision and appraisal training.

Common pitfalls

• Leading questions. "Don't you think it would be better if...?" is advice in disguise. If you have a suggestion, offer it openly, after they've had their say.
• Rescuing. The silence after a hard question feels long. Wait. The answer usually comes.
• Coaching when someone needs a clear message. If standards aren't being met, say so plainly first. Coaching on how to meet them can follow.
• Forgetting the power gap. You're their manager, not an independent coach, and the CIPD flags the power relationship as a concern when line managers coach. People may tell you what they think you want to hear, so be clear about what stays between you and what doesn't.
• No follow-up. If you never ask about the action, people learn the conversation didn't matter.

Coaching also leans on reading people: noticing frustration, nerves or defensiveness and adjusting to it. Our emotional intelligence training builds that side, and influencing skills training helps when you need to bring someone round rather than draw them out.

How Kasorb can help

Kasorb's management and leadership courses are five separate one-day courses: New Team Leader, Delegation Skills, Performance Management, Coaching Skills and Team Building. The Coaching Skills day covers coaching conversations and a simple structure for running them, and staff apply the tools to their own team and agree an action plan with the trainer. Each course runs on-site or live online for up to 12 staff, at one price for the group. Your trainer has used these skills for real, and certificates are emailed the next day.

FAQs

What are the main coaching skills for managers?

Listening to understand, asking open questions, reflecting back what you've heard, giving specific and honest feedback, and agreeing a clear action with a date to review it. Most managers use some of these already. Coaching means using them on purpose and letting the other person do most of the thinking.

What does GROW stand for in coaching?

GROW stands for Goal, Reality, Options and Will, with Will sometimes called Way forward. It was developed in the UK in the late 1980s by Sir John Whitmore and colleagues and became widely known through his 1992 book Coaching for Performance. It gives a coaching conversation a simple order to follow.

What is the difference between coaching and mentoring?

Coaching is non-directive: you ask questions and listen so the person reaches their own answer. Mentoring is when a more experienced colleague shares their knowledge and experience, usually over a longer period. Both rely on listening and questioning, and many managers switch between them depending on what the person needs.

Can a line manager coach their own team?

Yes. Most workplace coaching happens in one-to-ones and supervision with a line manager. The catch is the power gap: people may hold back with their manager. Be clear about what stays confidential, avoid leading questions, and keep coaching conversations separate from formal performance processes where you can.